Yet, as a journalist, I kept my distance, too. I was recognizable at meetings and events. As a journalist in a small city, I got to know lots of people. My career path allowed me to fit in and not fit in - all at once. I was able to be myself, have my own opinions and beliefs, yet still be accepted for them. ![]() belonging, I can say I often felt like I belonged. In looking at it through this new lens of fitting in vs. In college, I started to feel like I belonged, even in different groups and settings. Classmates and professors helped me see me different shades in the world, challenge my beliefs and think even more for myself. My roommates and friends offered different perspectives and ideas. My major pulled me into a group of like-minded journalists. Instead, I found friends who shared similar interests or with whom I enjoyed spending time. When I went to college, I reinvented myself. ![]() We understood each other, and though we didn’t always agree, we were there for each other, and we accepted each other. I did feel like I belonged, though, with my friends, especially my close friends. I knew I’d never be popular or even liked by the popular people, and I didn’t care. But by high school, I was done trying to fit in. In middle school, I gathered more friends, and by high school, my group was larger still, with a few very close friends. Quiet and smart, I had one close friend in elementary school. I’ve never really fit in, but I have figured out how to seem like I do. When I read it, my immediate reaction was: Yes! That’s it!īecause I was coming at it from a very different place. It took her several years and lots of research to figure out what it meant for her. Having struggled to fit in - to belong - Brown couldn’t make it work. Which I guess should not be surprising, considering where I’ve been.īrown’s first reaction to Angelou’s quote was that it was wrong. My own experience and thoughts took me in a different direction. It’s a good book, and there is a lot of great information in it.īut I took it - both the premise and the quote that started it all - in a different way. They said that belonging is being accepted for who you are fitting in is conforming to someone else’s expectations. In one chapter, Brown shared students’ descriptions of belonging and fitting in. She researched and studied our desire to belong and figured out how we can belong and connect with people, even when we are divided. ![]() ![]() The reward is great.īrown sought a sense or feeling of belonging during much of her life, yet she often felt like an outsider. The premise of Brown’s book is about belonging, which sprang from a Maya Angelou quote: You are only free when you realize you belong no place - you belong every place - no place at all. If we are true to ourselves, we may be standing alone in the “wilderness,” and that can be lonely. When we fit in, or try to fit in, we aren’t necessarily being true to ourselves. She writes about fitting in, belonging and braving the wilderness, which is standing alone for what you believe is right or being true to your beliefs. I recently read “Braving the Wilderness” by Brené Brown. I also feel like I’ve found where I belong, and that’s good. I have developed a knack for fitting in - or maybe I should say I seem to fit in.
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